Dick and the Robins
by hatsudami
Summary: Now imagine a show with all the Robins and all of them are tenny weeny babies running around and causing havoc. Special bonus: An Alvin and the Chipmunks style of show. Yup Papa Bats won't be so pleased xD.
1. Title Sequence

**Might as well resurrect this lil fic.**

 **The Robins (Parody of the chipmunks)**  
 **Dick- 12. He is Alvin as he is the leader of the gang and the lead vocalist XD plus the evil troublemaker though he gets away with it. Yup Papa Bats fears this one the most.**  
 **Jason- 11 The other Alvin who is more of the black sheep**  
 **Tim- 10 Simon as he is the smart guy and only sane man**  
 **Damian-8 Theodore The baby of the group who always whines though unlike Theodore he is one sassy kid.**  
 **The Gordons (parody of the chipettes)**  
 **Barbara- Dick's rival and female counterpart**  
 **Cassandra- Jason's counterpart**  
 **Stephanie- Tim's counterpart**  
 **Mar'i (yes I brought in Mar'i Grayson for this)- Damian's counterpart**  
 **The theme of the fictionous show in question is a parody of the original Chipmunks theme**

The opening sequence begins with the Robins getting out of a limo waving at the fans. Bruce who is already at the concert hall keeps staring at the watch.

 _Watch out, 'cause here we come_  
 _It's been a while but we're back with style so_  
 _Get set to have some fun_  
 _We'll bring you action and satisfaction_  
As soon as he hears the screaming fans, he looks up to see his sons whom are all dressed up in their signature slacks, Dick in a black shirt with a blue Nightwing insignia on the front moonwalks, Jason in a red hoodie with a lollipop in his mouth, Tim in a red jumper and dark jeans carrying little Damian who was wearing a yellow top with green shorts whom was trying to get Jason's lollipop whist Jason swats his hand away. Bruce then pushes them into the dressing room to get dressed.  
 _We're the Robins_  
 _R-O-B-I-N-S_  
 _We're the Robins_  
 _Gaurenteed to brighten your day_

Jason gets powdered up and almost chokes on his lollipop as a result, Tim and Damian both get their hair done, Damian sulking a bit at this whilst Dick sings at the top of his lungs whilst getting made up.

 _When you feel like a laugh_  
 _Give us a call we'll give you a ball and_  
 _If you feel like a song_  
 _Tune into us and sign right along_  
Minutes later, they walk out of their dressing rooms dressed in white suits with different colored ties, blue for Dick, red of Jason, green for Tim and yellow for Damian. Bruce then ushers the Robins to the stage where they head up and perform for their fans. Dick holds a guitar and dances around with Jason who plays the bass, Tim plays the keyboard whilst Damian plays the drums.

Then suddenly, some lightening falls onto the stage and creates a giant hole which makes the boys fall right into it. Bruce facepalms at this whilst Alfred, Oswald Cobblepot, Selina Kyle and Jim Gordon shake their heads at this. The boys pop their heads through the hole and finish the song.  
 _We're the Robins_  
 _Coming on stronger than ever before_  
 _We're the Robins_  
 _Dick,Jason, Tim and Lil D_

 _Do do, do do do do_  
 _Do do, do do do do_

 **And that is the opening sequence and just a little teaser.**


	2. Introducing the Robins

Here it is the first episode! Song used here is Bad Day by David Powter.

Bruce was just heading downstairs to train when a couple of voices stop him in his tracks. Taking a couple of steps back, he leans against the door of Dick's bedroom and listens.

[Dick] _Where is the moment we needed the most?_ ([Jason] _most, most, most_ )  
 _You kick up the leaves, and the magic is lost_ ([Jason] _lost, lost, lost_ )  
Ever since he was little, Dick had always been extremely hyperactive and full of energy. Never once would he frown, always smiling even in times of trouble. Perhaps it was that little energy of his that gets him out of trouble most of the time and as a result, it is Jason that takes the fall.

[Jason,Tim and Damian] _Ooh_

Still he never imagined that Dick could sing as well as he is singing now. Dancing is not that much of a problem since the kid is a circus brat and took up dancing lessons as a child. That explains his non-stop energy and crazy overdramatic antics.  
[Dick] _They tell me your blue skies fade to grey_  
 _They tell me your passion's gone away_  
 _And I don't need no carryin' on_

Jason on the otherhand is a elementary school hustler though Dick himself has traces of that. He is loudmouthed, just as dramatic and extremely sassy when it comes to authority figures though of course the two people he fears the most were Daddy Bats and Alfred.  
[Jason, Tim and Damian] Ahh

[Dick] _You stand in the line just to hit a new low_ ([Jason] _low, low_ )  
 _You're faking a smile with the coffee to go_ ([Jason] _go, go_ )  
Timmy was the quieter one who rarely talks and almost always chastises his brothers even though really, he is no different from them and causes just as much, if not more mischief than they do. He is the smart kid and junior detective and always invents the craziest over the top gadgets, some of which Bruce occasionally borrows.  
[Jason, Tim and Damian] _Ah, ooh_  
Lastly, Damian aka Little D or Baby Bat. He is a cute yet slightly moody and cranky kid who whines over the littlest of things and mostly eats and sleeps but still does his work diligently anyway. Bruce cannot help but wonder how he ended up with these four lovely yet crazy kids. Nevertheless, he is glad to be a father as despite all the craziness in his life, he knows he has people to come back to, people who would still love him no matter what.  
[Dick] _You tell me your life's been way off line_  
 _You're falling to pieces every time_  
 _And I don't need no carryin' on_

[All] _Because you had a bad day_  
 _You're takin' one down_  
 _You sing a sad song just to turn it around_  
 _You say you don't know_  
 _You tell me don't lie_  
 _You work at a smile and you go for a ride_  
 _You had a bad day_  
 _The camera don't lie_  
 _You're coming back down and you really don't mind_  
 _You had a bad day_  
 _Oh, you had a bad day_

[Dick] _Mmm, oh, yeah_  
 _Mmm, oh, mmm_

[Jason, Tim and Damian] _Ooh_  
Bruce hums and bops his head along to the song. He is surprised that Dick is dominating most of it, though that should not really surprise anyone since Dick has made it a point to be the main star. He feels a hand on his shoulder. He turns around to see his ever faithful butler and father figure Alfred standing beside him with a huge smile on his face. "They sing beautifully." Says Alfred. Bruce nods and smiles. "Couldn't be more proud of them."  
[Dick] _Well, you need a blue sky holiday_  
 _The point is they laugh at what you say_  
 _And I don't need no carryin' on_

[All] _You had a bad day_  
 _You're takin' one down_  
 _You sing a sad song just to turn it around_  
 _You say you don't know_  
 _You tell me don't lie_  
 _You work at a smile and you go for a ride_  
 _You had a bad day_  
 _The camera don't lie_  
 _You're coming back down and you really don't mind_  
 _You had a bad day_

[Dick] _Ooh, a holiday_

[Jason, Tim and Damian] _Ahh_

[Dick] _Sometimes the system goes on the blink_  
 _And the whole thing turns out wrong_  
 _You might not make it back and you know_  
 _That you could be well, oh, that strong_  
 _And I'm not wrong_

 _So where is the passion when you need it the most?_ ([Jason] _most, most_ )  
 _Oh, you and I_  
 _You kick up the leaves and the magic is lost_ ([Jason] _lost, lost, lost_ )

[All] _'Cause you had a bad day_  
 _You're takin' one down_  
 _You sing a sad song just to turn it around_  
 _You say you don't know_  
 _You tell me don't lie_  
 _You work at a smile and you go for a ride_  
 _You had a bad day_  
 _You've seen what you like_  
 _And how does it feel for one more time?_  
 _You had a bad day_

[Dick] _You had a bad day_

Both Alfred and Bruce walk into the room and clap for the boys, catching the kids offguard. "Bravo young masters!" says Alfred. Bruce merely nods and smiles. Damian runs towards his father and gives him a huge hug.

Bruce chuckles and lifts up the little baby. "You ok Little D?" The kid pouts. "Is it bad if I want a hug?" The others giggled and run over to their dad and give him a hug. "We sang this just to cheer you up dad because we have noticed how sad you have been feeling lately." Says Tim.

Jason then pulls Alfred forward to join in the group hug. "Yes daddy, we want you to smile and not feel sad. We want you to be happy." Says Dick with a huge grin on his face.

Bruce smiles softly. Despite the mischief these four get into, there isn't a doubt that they all love and care for him and at times do that for attention. Bruce sighs happily. "How did I get you kids? I do not deserve this." He says, looking away so as not to cry in front of them.

Damian pats his daddy on the head. "Papa, don't cry." He says in his usual cute voice. Bruce chuckles softly as he absent-mindly wipes a tear away from the corners of his eyes. "God you kids.." The boys all laughed. "Hey dad, how about we head out to see a movie?" Dick suggests. Bruce thinks about that. "You know, that is not such a bad idea. Besides, we have been working non-stop and have never gotten the chance to actually kick back and relax." He says.

Damian pouts. "Pwease no ghost movies or scary movies." He whines. Everyone laughs. "Ok kiddo, no horror movies." Jason pouts. "But I want to watch one!" he whined. Dick glares at his younger brother. "Will you considerate of Little D?!" Jason fumes. "Oh like you are ever considerate of anyone PrettyBoy?!" he retorts.

Bruce shakes his head and leads the two younger Robins away whilst Alfred tries to settle the fight between the two oldest ones.

 **Here you go. Some silly Batfam fluff. Bruce is one lucky dad**


	3. The Grand Debut

**This marks their public debut as a group and also the debut of the female counterparts the Batgirls. The song used here is the Alvin and the Chipmunks version of Lady Gaga's Bad Romance. Dick would be a freaky drama queen here be warned.**

"Can we go now?" Jason grumbles impatiently. Alfred chuckles as he helps Damian to knot his tie. "Now now Master Jason. No need to be impatient." Says Alfred. Jason scowls and folds his arms. Bruce was invited to a party and was taking the boys with him. The downside: they all had to wear black suits, something that Jason did not particularly enjoy. Tim pats him on the shoulder. "There there Jaybird." He said. Jason simply pouts. "Why must I wear this?" Damian asks as he fiddles with his tie. Bruce then walks into the room, adjusting his own tie. "Right now is everyone ready?"

"Wait, where is Big Bird?" Damian asked. Before anyone could say anything, Dick slides into the room. "The bird has arrived!" he says in a sing song tone. Bruce mentally facepalms. Trust Dick to sing as usual.

"Right kids now let's go!" They arrive a couple minutes later at Gotham Atrium where the vent was being held. The boys then head downstairs, greeting all the guests as politely as possible, comporting themselves as good well-mannered kids, a stark contrast to how they are really like which only a few people know. "Ah, there they are!" The Waynes turn around as Jim Gordon, Bruce's business partner and best friend since kindergarten walks over to them with three young girls around each of the boys' ages right behind him.

"They your daughters?" Bruce asks. Jim nods. "As a matter of fact they are! This is Barbara." He points at the oldest one who is Dick's age mate dressed in a cute pink dress. She bats her eyelashes at Dick who winks back at her.

"That's Cassandra." A tiny Asian girl smiles at Jason who wags his eyebrow. "That is Stephanie." The blonde in question smiles and waves at Tim who blushes. Jim Gordon then stares down at the youngest one with dark hair dressed in purple who had hidden herself behind her father's feet. "That is my little baby Mari." Damian pokes his head from behind his brother's back and stares at the girl who blushes. He then walks over to her and holds out his hand. "Don't be scared. I won't hurt you." He tells her reassuredly. Mari hesitantly comes out and takes his hand and smiles at him.

"Ok kids, how about you get to know each other?" says Bruce as he and Comissioner Gordon head off to chat elsewhere. "You look cool!" says Barbara. Dick grins proudly. "Why of course I am cool mon Cherie. I mean, we are Waynes and we Waynes love to live large." Barbara giggles. "Yeah well, we Gordons are no slouches." Dick raises an eyebrow. "Oh yeah?" She nods.

Mari and Damian simply stare at each other and smile. Jason places a hand over Cassandra's shoulder. "Tell me something, what kind of guys do you like?" Cassandra giggles and blushes. "Oh I don't know...tall, dark and handsome." Jason smirks. "If that is the case, then I'm your man."

Tim and Stephanie meanwhile engage in a little science convo. "Really? You can create that?!" Stephanie exclaims. Tim chuckles. "It took me a couple of tries to get it right but I got it anyway. Will show you sometime." Some boring band plays music in the background boring the kids out.

"You know, this party is starting to get a little boring for my liking ya know?" Barbara says with a little sigh. It was at that point that a wicked idea lights up in Dick's brain. _Oh do I have an evillous idea._

Bruce sighs as he sips another glass of wine whilst watching the guests. Then suddenly, the lights go out. "Huh, is something wrong with the power?" a guest asked. Bruce furrows his eyebrow in suspicion. _I hope it is not who I think it is._

The light come back on and everyone's attention is diverted to the main stage where the band was, In their place were the Robins. "Oh my-" Dick then opens his mouth and sings.

 __[Dick] _Oh-oh-oh-oh-oooh-oh-oh-oooh-oh-oh_  
Caught in a bad romance

Whilst he sings this part, he locks eyes with Barbara who blushes faintly. The others soon join in as well.

[Robins] _Oh-oh-oh-oh-oooh-oh-oh-oooh-oh-oh_

[Dick] _Caught in a bad romance_

Rah-rah-ah-ah-ah  
Roma-roma-maa  
Gaga-u-la-la  
Want your bad romance

The guests then start to shake loose and dance along to the music. Bruce just stands there, unsure about whether to scold the boys or praise them for turning a rather boring event into a more lively one. Jim pats him on the shoulder. "They are really talented, those boys of yours." He nods. He has no choice but let them be free to express themselves.

[Robins] _Rah-rah-ah-ah-ah_  
Roma-roma-maa  
Gaga-u-la-la  
Want your bad romance

During the performance, Dick begins to show off some crazy dance moves, making some ladies in the audience to squeal. Barbara frowns at those girls. _No one takes my Dickie from me!_

[Dick] _I want your ugly  
I want your disease (hey)  
I want your everything  
As long as it's free  
I want your love_

[Robins] _Love, love, love_  
I want your love (yeah, hey)

The real shocker was hearing the little baby sing. Usually Little D would hide behind his brothers but this time around, they are letting him take the spotlight. Bruce claps and cheers for his son, finally letting go and having fun. Seeing his dad cheer for him made Damian smile cutely, melting the hearts of the older ladies in the audience.

[Damian] _I want your drama  
The touch of your hand  
I want your leather-studded kiss in the sand  
And I want your love  
Love, love, love, I want your love_

[Robins] _Love, love, love, I want your love_

[Jason] _You know that I want you  
And you know that I need you  
_[Tim] _I want your bad  
Your bad romance (hey)_

[Dick and Jason] _I want your lovin'  
And I want your revenge  
You and me could write a bad romance_

[Tim and Damian] _Oh-oh-oh-oh-oooh_

[Dick and Jason] _I want your lovin'_  
All your love is revenge  
You and me could write a bad romance

The real surprise was Dick announced, "Ladies and gentlemen, the Batgirls!"The Gordon sisters scurry over to the stage and sing along too. "Wait, so your girls can sing huh?!' says Bruce. Jim gasps. "Even I am surprised."

 __[The Batgirls] _Oh-oh-oh-oh-oooh-oh-oh-oooh-oh-oh_

[Barbara] _Caught in a bad romance_

 _(Repeat)  
_ [Batgirls and Robins] _Rah-rah-ah-ah-ah_  
Roma-roma-maa  
Gaga-u-la-la  
Want your bad romance

When Barbara sings her part, she pulls Dick by the tie and draws him closer to her, locking eyes with him. Dick smirks and winks playfully at her. They then break apart and Barbara does a couple of cool dance moves of her own as though challenging Dick. Their fathers glare at each other. "Kids of nowadays." Says Bruce. "Tell me about it." Says Jim.

[Barbara ] _I want your horror  
I want your design (hey)  
'Cause you're a criminal  
As long as you're mine  
I want your love_

[Batgirls] _Love, love, love, I want your love (hey)_

[Stephanie] _I like your crazy  
I like all your tricks  
Want you here by my side  
Through the thin and the thick  
I want your love  
Love, love, love  
I want your love_

[Batgirls] _Love, love, love, I want your love_

[Mari] _You know that I want you  
And you know that I need you  
_[Cassandra] _I want your bad  
Your bad romance (hey)_

[Dick, Jason, Barbara] _I want your loving  
And I want your revenge  
You and me could write a bad romance_

[Tim and Stephanie] _Oh-oh-oh-oh-oooh_

[Mari and Damian] _I want your lovin'_  
All your love is revenge  
You and me could write a bad romance

 __[Robins] _Oh-oh-oh-oh-oooh-oh-oh-oooh-oh-oh_

[Batgirls] _Caught in a bad romance_

 _(Repeat)  
_ [Batgirls and Robins] _Rah-rah-ah-ah-ah  
Roma-roma-maa  
Gaga-u-la-la  
Want your bad romance_

[Dick] _Walk walk fashion baby  
Work it and make them kidsgo crazy  
Walk walk fashion baby  
Work it and make them kids go crazy_

 _I want your love  
And I want your revenge  
I want your love  
I don't wanna be friends_

 _J'veux ton amour  
Et je veux ton revenge  
J'veux ton amour  
I don't wanna be friends (aaah)_

 _No, I don't wanna be friends (aaah)  
No, I don't wanna be friends (aaah)  
Want your bad romance (aaah)  
Want your bad romance_

[Barbara, Jason, Tim] _I want your love  
And I want your revenge  
You and me could write a bad romance_

[Dick] _Want your bad romance_

[Damian, Cassandra, Mari] _Oh-oh-oh-oh-oooh_

[Stephanie, Tim, Barbara] _I want your love and  
All your lovers' revenge  
You and me could write a bad romance_

[Dick] _Want your bad romance_

 __[Batgirls] _Oh-oh-oh-oh-oooh-oh-oh-oooh-oh-oh_

[Robins] _Caught in a bad romance_

[Dick] _Want your bad romance_

(Repeat)

Once they finish their performance, the entire room gives them a standing ovation. "You didn't tell me that you guys can sing." Says Barbara. Dick chuckled. "You are one to talk Babs." Their parents walk over to them. "Usually I would scold you kids for this but not tonight." Says Bruce. The kids all grin at each other. "That was amazing I must say."

"Splendid! Absolutely splendid!" They all turn around as music tycoon Oswald Cobblepot walks over to them, his assistant Selina Kyle following right behind him. "Forgive me Mr Wayne and Mr Gordon but these kids of yours are quite awesome!"

Damian places his hands on his hips. "Lemme guess, Arkham Records CEO Oswald Cobblepot correct?" he says in his most business-like tone. Bruce smirks. When it comes to business transactions which is what this situation is, Damian would be really sassy.

Selina smiles at the kid. "Your youngest right?" Bruce nods. "Yup, that's Damian or Little D as we call him." Selina chuckles softly. "He is so cute." Damian pouts at this. "I am not cute!" he whines. Everyone laughs. "Say, how about we meet up for lunch huh? Cos your kids do have loads of potential ya know?"

Bruce and Jim stare at the kids who all give nods of approval. "Very well then, we shall see each other at the Hard Rock Café tomorrow for lunch to discuss their careers." Says Jim. The kids all jumped up and squealed with joy at this news.

"Perfect! Absolutely Pefect! Soon I shall be a star!" Dick shouts as he fist pumps. Barbara snorts. "Yeah but you and I know that there can never be two big stars in one place." She says. Dick glares at her. "Is that a challenge Miss Gordon?" She smirks. "Why course Mr Wayne." He smirks. "May the best kid win."

Notes:

 **And that is the opening sequence and just a little teaser.**


	4. First Single

**I swear when I heard Witch Doctor, well the original version, I fell over laughing because it is hilarious especially the Chipmunk parts. Plus that song is catchy and gets stuck in your brain for days. I have singing oo ee ooo ah ah for hours that my mum just stared at me thinking I had gone insane. Yup, that is the song I am using here except it is the Chipmunk version that they sang on the Alvin Show.**

Dick was messing around in Bruce's room when he comes across a CD. "Hmm..what's this?" he asks. He takes it to his room and plays it on his laptop. He gasps as he hears his father's voice. _So daddy was once a singer?_ "Hey brother whatc-" Jason stops mid-sentence and listens. "Oh my, is that our dad?!"

The other two Robins run into the room and listen as well. ""So dad used to be a singer?" said Tim. "This sounds more like a demo though." Says Damian. Dick smirks. "Yeah but we can change that."

Hours later, Bruce sighs as he sits down on his chair. Juggling running a huge company like Wayne Enterprises and handling 4 mischieous little birds can be stressful at times. He then decides to surf the net to kill his boredom when he comes across a video that titled Witch Doctor.

Curious, he clicks on it. He gasps as he sees a video of his boys doing their thing and singing an old demon he recorded years ago that never got to release. The boys were standing inside a recording studio, singing the song in question. Bruce simply nods his head and hums along. Even though he never recorded that song, he is glad that the boys used it as it suits them better.

[Dick] _I told the witch doctor I was in love with you  
I told the witch doctor I was in love with you  
And then the witch doctor, he told me what to do  
He said that_

Throughout the entire song, the boys sang in high-pitched Chipmunkish voices, much to Bruce's astonishment. "Where did they learn that technique?" __

[Robins] _Ooo eee, ooo ah ah ting tang  
Walla walla, bing bang  
Ooo eee, ooo ah ah ting tang  
Walla walla, bing bang_

 _Ooo eee, ooo ah ah ting tang  
Walla walla, bing bang  
Ooo eee, ooo ah ah ting tang  
Walla walla, bing bang_

[Dick] _I told the witch doctor you didn't love me true  
I told the witch doctor you didn't love me nice  
And then the witch doctor, he gave me this advice  
He said that_

[Robins] _Ooo eee, ooo ah ah ting tang  
Walla walla, bing bang  
Ooo eee, ooo ah ah ting tang  
Walla walla, bing bang_

 _Ooo eee, ooo ah ah ting tang  
Walla walla, bing bang  
Ooo eee, ooo ah ah ting tang  
Walla walla, bing bang_

[Dick] _You've been keeping love from me  
Just like you were a miser  
And I'll admit I wasn't very smart _([Robins] _very smart_ ) _  
So I went out and found myself  
A guy that's so much wiser  
And he taught me the way to win your heart_([Robins] _win your heart_ ) __

[Dick] _My friend the witch doctor, he taught me what to say  
My friend the witch doctor, he taught me what to do  
I know that you'll be mine when I say this to you_

[Robins] _Ooo eee, ooo ah ah ting tang  
Walla walla, bing bang  
Ooo eee, ooo ah ah ting tang  
Walla walla, bing bang_

 _Ooo eee, ooo ah ah ting tang  
Walla walla, bing bang  
Ooo eee, ooo ah ah ting tang  
Walla walla, bing bang_

[Dick] _You've been keeping love from me  
Just like you were a miser  
And I'll admit I wasn't very smart  
So I went out and found myself  
A guy that's so much wiser  
And he taught me the way to win your heart_

[Dick] _My friend the witch doctor, he taught me what to say  
My friend the witch doctor, he taught me what to do  
I know that you'll be mine when I say this to you  
Oh baby_

[Robins] _Ooo eee, ooo ah ah ting tang  
Walla walla, bing bang  
Ooo eee, ooo ah ah ting tang  
Walla walla, bing bang_

 _(Repeat 3x)_

Bruce immediately heads home and finds Oswald and Selina with the boys and Alfred. "Congratulations Mr Wayne. Your boys just scored themselves a number one hit!" says Oswald. The boys squealed and jumped around and hugged each other. Bruce could hardly believe his ears. His sons just got their first taste of success as a group. "Come here boys!" he says, opening his arms for them. The Robins run over to him and hug him. "I am so proud of all of you." He says. "You should have told us about that song dad." Says Jason. "Yeah because we want to sing with you daddy." Says Damian.

Bruce smiled. "I had to give up my career after a terrible breakup." The boys stare at their dad and felt bad for him. "Yeah but that should not let you give up on life dad. Just because some woman ditched you does not mean you should give up on yourself. You are better than that. Had we not met you, Lord knows where we would have been." Said Dick. Bruce smiles. "Thanks kids." Oswald and Selina smiled softly at this whilst Alfred sobs at this.

 **There we go their first single**


	5. Dick for President

**Dick and his massive ego at work good God *facepalms* Yup, Papa Bats, might as well shit in his panties now. Yup, Dickiebird is the master schemer of the group and basically their rise to fame and every other thing that goes with it is all his doing basically because Dick seems to know a lot more about how the industry works than he lets on, much to Papa Bats' horrific dismay because how else did they score themselves a slew of hits and a massive fanbase? Funny, he sings in majority of their songs save for one or two occasions where the others may shine a bit but still get overshadowed by him because no way in hell is Dick gonna let the others try to upstage him though Damian could do that in the future. Song used in this chapter:**

 **Alvin for president by the Chipmunks though we would call it Dick for President here xD. Yup, says a lot about Dickie's ego xD**

The video begins with Dick standing on a desk in a classroom rallying his troops. The Batgirls and a lot of other kids who are their real life classmates and friends in school, gather round as Dick begins his campaign. The walls of the entire school are decorated with **Dick Wayne for President Posters.**

 __[Dick] _And further more, my dear friends,  
What this country needs is a great leader!  
Me! I promise you TWO bicycles in every garage,  
Four Christmases every year and..._

Bruce who plays the role of a teacher in this video passes by and watches the commotion and then walks in. __

[Bruce] _Hey kids, what's he doing?_

[Jason] _He's running for President._

[Tim] _(Laughs) Yeah, President._

[Damian] Yay! Big D for President! __

[Bruce] _Really? Well isn't that ... PRESIDENT?!_

[Dick] _Did you call me?_

 __[Bruce] _Dick, you can't be President._

[Dick] _Why?_

[Bruce] _Well, because you're too young, and-_

Dick _In addition, when I'm president..._

Bruce then slams his hand onto a desk, causing the kids to panic and get into their seats. He then begins to teach the kids the words to the song which they all sing along rather reluctantly. Barbara rolls her eyes in boredom at the back whilst Dick smirks as he hatches an evil scheme to take his campaign to the next level. __

[Bruce] _Dick be quiet and sing our new song. Now here are the words.  
It's nice,_

[The Robins] _It's nice,_

[Bruce] _It's good,_

[The Robins] _It's good._

[Bruce] _When you live like you should,_

[The Robins] _When you live like you should,_

[Bruce] _In peaceful harmony_

[The Robins] _In peaceful harmony,_

[Bruce] _Take our,_

[The Robins] _Take our,_

[Bruce] _Advice,_

[The Robins] _Advice,_

[Bruce] _The way we live is nice,_

[The Robins] _The way we live is nice,_

[Bruce] _In peaceful harmony_

Dick then gets up and sings. __

[Dick] _I hope you vote for me!_

Bruce taps a cane on the desk. __

[Bruce] _Now quit that, quit it.  
We're so,_

[The Robins] _We're so,  
_  
[Bruce] _Polite,_

[The Robins] _Polite,_

[Bruce] _We hardly ever fight,_

[The Robins] _We hardly ever fight,_

[Bruce] _We live in harmony,_

[The Robins] _We live in harmony,_

[Bruce] _That's better.  
Don't care if we live in a tent,_

[The Robins] _Don't care if we live in a tent,_

 __[Bruce] _Just as long as we pay the rent,_

[The Robins] _Just as long as-_

[Dick] _I'm your president!_

Dick then gets up and sings that part at the top of his lungs. The other kids giggle at this. It is no secret that Dick is a large ham and likes to be overdramatic. __

[Bruce] _It's nice,_

[The Robins] _It's nice,_

[Bruce] _It's good,_

[The Robins] _It's good._

[Bruce] _When you live like you should,_

 __[The Robins] _When you live like you should,_

[Bruce] _In peaceful harmony,_

[Dick] _In Washington, D.C!_

Once again, Dick disrupts the class and this time, everyone falls over laughing. Bruce literally fumes at this. __

[Bruce] _Stop changing the words!_

[Dick] _And with me in the White House-_

[Bruce] _RICHARD!_

[Dick] _And, another thing, dear friends. Why shouldn't we have a penny ice cream cone?_

[Damian] _Uh, I don't know!_

[Dick] _Little D, you and TIm can be my campaign manager._

[Damian] Yay! __

[Tim] _(laughs) Oh boy, your honor!_

[Dick] _And Jason, I believe I'll make you vice-president!_

[Jason] _Why not! *snickers at Bruce's predicament*_

[Bruce] _Mr. President, will you and your cabinet kindly sing?_

The Robins exchange evil smirks and sing the song but this time change the lines to suit Dick's campaign motives or rather, his evillous prank. __

[The Robins] _We don't care if we live in a tent,  
Just as long as Dick's President!  
_Dick grins widely and poofs out his chest. _  
_[Dick] _That's me!_

[The Robins] _He's nice, He's good, Send Dick,  
Yes you should, To Washington D.C!_

[Dick] _And in conclusion, dear friends,_

[Dick] _Richard, will you..._

[Dick] _I am certain you will elect me the next President of the United States of America!_

He smirks as he says that final line and that prompts all the kids in the end to chant **We want Richard** at the end several times whilst Dick fistpumps in triumph. Meanwhile, Bruce facepalms with Jim Gordon and Alfred comforting him. __

[All the kids] _We want Richard! We want Richard! We want RIchard! We want Richard! We want Richard!_

 **Poor Bruce haha. Dick is gonna really make his life a living hell xD. Richard would be that naughty kid that stir up drama in class but would somehow get away with it.**


	6. Cracks in the Wall

p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"strongThe rivalry between the Robins and the Batgirls now the Barbies intensifies here. Poor Damian. There is a timeskip here about ten years. Yup Dick is now 22, Jason 21, Tim 20 and Damian 18 here. Loads of swearing in year no thanks to them now being a bunch of wangsty adults. Trigger warning: possible suicidal undertones. Also Dick is gonna be a bitch here. Why? See for yourself. This should remind you of a certain infamous interview of a certain pop princess by a person called Diane Sawyer. Yup, that one./strong/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;""Dick you are taking forever!" Jason yells as he flops onto the bed. Damian folds his arms and pouts. "Tt!" Tim merely shakes his head. Dick being the overbearing diva that he was would take long hours to get dressed. Considering how vain he is, it should not surprise anyone./p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"Dick stomps into the room wearing a black shirt with some strange blue bird insignia on the front and a pair of dark blue jeans and blue sneakers. "Jay, do me a favour and KEEP QUIET!" he screeches, making the other birds to cower in fear. Nothing scares them more than an angry bossy Dickie which is why his evil schemes always succeeds. He just knows how to manipulate and bully others into doing his evil bidding./p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;""Jeez Big D, no need to be dramatic." Says Tim. Damian says, "Tt!" to this. He shoots them the Batglare which silences all of them. "I do whatever the hell pleases me thank you very much. Besides, I gosta look hot at all times." he says. The others rolled their eyes. Trust Dick to be a narcissist. Not surprising since he is their leader and the one that the ladies flock to the most./p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"The TV comes on and shows the Barbara having an interview with a CNN reporter. "Now there have been rumours going on about you and Dick Grayson lately. That you and Dick have broken up." Dick sighed. They did break up weeks ago and that was because Barbara cheated on him with Roy Harper his rival. Things got so bad that he literally shut down for days, it is the most vulnerable he had been./p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"Barbara nods. "Dick and I made a promise that we will not disclose what truly happened that day but all I can say is that it was amicable." she says. Dick snorts. "Amicable my ass." he says. "There is also the issue of the purity ring that he wears. Does he still wear it or did he lose his virginity?" the interviewer asked. "Whoa! What's with the invasion of privacy dammit?!" says Jason. "Yeah, what's their fucking business?!" Tim shouts. Damian simply stares in disbelief. Bruce was watching in his room and frowned. Barbara looks away awkwardly before muttering. "He lost his virginity to me."/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"Almost immediately the media ran with the news story, salvaging Dick and the Robins, well Dick mostly at every given opportunity. Dick naturally shut down at this as he ran into his room and locked himself up. "DICK!" the other three yell and knock on the door. Dick does not answer them and breaks down in tears. "B-But she told me she would not tell anyone except her sisters. " he mutters. He looks around for something sharp and then finds a pair of scissors on the beside table./p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;""Quick, we need to get in there before he does something crazy!" says Jason. He and Tim try to break down the door. "Pardon me." says Alfred. They step aside and Alfred kicks the door open. They gasp as soon as they see the scissors near Dick's wrist which was bleeding. "HAVE YOU LOST YOUR MIND?!" Jason shouts. Tim rushes over to his older brother and takes the scissors away. Damian breaks down upon seeing his brother in his pathetic state. Tim quickly cleans up and patches his wound for him./p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;""Master Dick." says Alfred. "No...you guys leave me.." Damian hugs him and sobs into his chest. Bruce was standing by the hallway, his heart crushed at seeing his son in such a terrible state. He just found out about Barbara releasing a song to capitalise on this and knowing that girl, she will surely win unless Dick fires back some way but in his current state, maybe it is not advisable./p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"Bruce sighs and walks over to his son and hugs him. "It's alright son. Everything will be alright." he says in the most soothing tone possible. Dick simply nods, not knowing what to say. "What do we do dad?" Damian asked. Bruce sighs and pats the baby's head. "We cannot stay silent forever." says Jason. "Yeah, we need to say something because Barbara has gone way over board. She is the cheat not him." says Damian. Tim then begins to think. "Would it be too early for a relationship rebound?" Tim asks./p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"Dick glares at him. "What do you mean?" Tim smirks. "For once Dickiebird, you are not the scheming one here." he says. "Anyhow, remember Kori Anders?" Dick nods. Kori Anders was a member of a not so popular girl band back then. Now rumour has it that she could be going solo now. "Uhm...what has she got to do with right now?" Tim's smirk broadens, frightening the shit out of both Dick and Bruce. "She told me about a song that she is working on and was looking for a male solo artist to duet with her."/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;""So you want me to duet with her?" Bruce grins. "You know, that could be a good idea. Think about it, Kori is beautiful, heck way more attractive than Barbara with a lot of talent and sex appeal and would be the perfect rival for Barbara on so many levels. Also this would be the perfect rebound for you in the romantic aspect of things." says Bruce. Dick stops and then blinks. "But isn't it a little too fast?"/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;""Oh come on Dick, like they said, this would be the perfect rebound. All you have to do is to meet Kori. But before then, damage control for the current situation." says Jason. Bruce nods. "Will discuss with Lucius about that. Knowing the paps, they will come hounding Dick at any moment." Bruce turned out to be right as the next couple of weeks turned out to be hellish as everywhere Dick went, the paparazzi followed him./p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;""This is a serious case." says Oswald. Team Robin had gathered in the boardroom and were discussing the next line of action in regards to Dick and the whole Barbara situation. "We have to actually say the truth because that Gordon bitch is really trying to sabotage Dick for her own advantage. I mean, she did that to Duke Thomas and look where that landed the dude." says Helena. Bruce sighs. "She is right but it is better if Dick himself speaks up about that." says Jason. "Agreed. Let him talk about the break up and set the record straight." says Edward Nigma, the boys' producer./p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"It was at that moment that Dick walks into the room. Everyone gasps upon seeing him. In stark contrast with the smiley ever cheerful yet arrogant but nice Dick Grayson everyone knows, the man that stood in front of them was the shadow of the old Dick Grayson, his hair was disshevelled, his eyes drooping as though he was sleeping. Also he wore slacks rather than being sharply dressed like he is normally dressed. emThe press are going to have a field day with this. /emLucius thinks to himself./p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"Dick staggers to the table and takes his seat beside Damian. "Hello guys. What's cooking?" he slurs in his typical joking tone. Unfortunately his attempt to lighten up the mood fell flat as all eyes were on him. "Dick, you ok?" Bruce asked. Dick nods. "Yes I'm fine even though I haven't been sleeping for the past couple days." Bruce panics inwardly. emDon't tell me he has been overworking is ass to death./em/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"Tim sighed. Dick has been spending long hours, recording and practicing. He released like 4 solo albums back then and as always, the demand for new Dick material is on the all time high, especially now with all the drama about him and Barbara and the manner by which the media continues to salvage him. "You need to rest." says Jason. Dick pouts. "No. I need to get this done before it is too late."/p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;""He does have a point. The comeback can wait. Others can have their moment but you can still gain your crown back later." says Oswald. At those words, Dick flares up. "WHAT DO YOU MEAN WAIT?! I CANNOT WAIT! I WANT MY VOICE TO BE HEARD!" Dick then gets up and stands on the table. "I WILL NOT SIT HERE AND LET OTHERS RUN THEIR MOUTH ABOUT ME! NO! NO! NO!" Jason, Lucius and Bruce struggle and eventually manage to get Dick down. "Dick calm down." says Jason. "Yeah you are really worrying us right now!" says Selena. Damian simply stares on in confusion. ""B-But you don't understand...I need to say something!" says Dick. "I..I can't let them win. I can't let her win." Upon hearing her, everyone knew he meant Barbara./p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;""Maybe he should do the interview." says Oswald. "But in his current state?!" says Edward. "I am worried for him." says Selena. "We all are but let us do this." says Lucius. Bruce shakes his head whilst Jason and Tim try to calm their now hyper brother. Weeks after that, he grants an interview to Diane Sawyer./p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;""Now let us go over your background. You grew up as a skilled acrobat in the circus correct?" Dick nods. A lot of people were shocked with this as they all thought that he grew up as Bruce Wayne's son from the very beginning, not knowing that Bruce actually adopted him when he was six. "I grew up in the circus until my parents passed away when I was just 6 years old. They died as a result of a terrible accident that happened during a performance.I..I saw the whole thing with my eyes." he says solemnly. A couple of people felt sorry for him though that still did not quell the hate towards him as a lot of people still felt he was faking it./p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;""I am sorry to hear that." says Diane, who did not even sound sorry for a remote second. "How did you meet Bruce Wayne?" He answered. "He was there the night my parents died and he so happens to be a good friend of my dad's and dad told him that if anything should ever happen to him then he should take care of me which he accepted, hence how I ended up being his legally adopted son." he says. Diane nodded. "Now the singing thing, how did it begin?" He smiles softly at this. "I have always been singing ever since I was little. I would always sing and dance everyday and thus when the others came in, we would sing and entertain ourselves and also make a racket along the way." Diane chuckles at this. "I love that you love your family so much." Dick smiles. "They are all I have if things fall apart." That line made everyone panic as they wondered what was going on in Dick's mind. "Is he going insane?" a concerned fan asked whilst watching the interview./p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"As though sensing his inner turmoil, Diane pounced in. "Now that brings me to a rather controversial issue. Your relationship with Barbara Gordon. You and her have been dating since when?" she asked. "Since I was 12. She was 15." People gasped at that revelation. "Hold up, she said she was 13 when you guys met." said Diane. Dick simply laughs. "Oh did she now. Well hate it break it to y'all but she was 15. You see, Barbara is an evil little snake who manipulates people into doing her bidding. I mean, I clearly told her then that I was not ready and yet that bitch forced me into having sex with her against my will. I am sure she has a sex tape I know nothing about hiding somewhere. Oh, and I was 14 then by the way." Almost immediately, the internet explodes with a lot of people coming to Dick's defense with the other side siding with Barbara and saying that Dick was lying./p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;""So she actually raped you?" says Diane. Dick snorts. "I did not say that but you did." he snarks. People laughed loving that the old snarky Dick Grayson was back. "She said you cheated on her?" Dick rolled his eyes. "Bitch please. If I did, I wouldn't have slept with her in the first place. I mean, do you journalists ever do your fucking research? I found out that she cheated on me a couple days ago with my rival Roy Harper and yet she paints me to be the villain. I get it, I understand that not everyone is gonna like me and stuff but then again, that gives you bitches no right to fucking judge me because I am human like you and thus will make mistakes! But you know, this is what I get for opening up my heart years ago when that bitch walked into my life. I even regret ever saying stuff about my virginity when I should have kept that to myself and dodged the fucking bullet! You know what, screw it, this interview is over!" With that, Dick gets up and walks out, leaving a stunned Diane Sawyer./p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"That interview makes headlines as the media have a field day tearing Dick apart despite his candid confession. Naturally, Barbara benefits from this backlash as she releases yet another diss track aimed at Dick, making Dick to break down yet again. Certainly does not help that the video has a Dick look alike in it./p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;""WHY?!" He screams, flipping the table. He begins to throw things around in rage. "Dick calm down!" says Jason. "NO JAY! DON'T TELL ME THAT SHIT!" Dick shouts. Tim and Jason struggle to calm him down and get him to sit down. "Leave me alone!" says Dick as he pushes them away and heads to his room and locks himself up in his room. Alfred who happened to be there walks past the other Robins. /p  
p style="font-family: 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', 'GNU Unifont', Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;""Master Dick, please let me in." Dick opens the door and lets Alfred in. Still the other two run in and give their brother a hug. "Please Dickiebird calm down!" says Jason. "Yeah you are stressed out bro. Besides, you have been thinking more about her and not enough about yourself! It's time you do you. Let us have fun tonight bro!" says Tim. Dick smiles a bit. "Ok but I need to clean myself up first."/p 


	7. Breakdown

**Let me introduce Joker and Tarantula here, well the au versions of them. Song used: Gimme More by Britney Spears. I think you all know where this is heading right?**

Dick soon moves into the apartment that he bought himself in Bludhaven which is a couple miles away from Gotham city. Haven put all his belongings in the house, he heads into his room and lies down on top of the unmade bed and sighs. He just needed to get away from everyone and everything for a while because the stress was really getting to him. He cannot do anything without people watching him and judging every single mistake he makes. Perhaps this is the price he has to make for being way too popular and famous.

 _Maybe I should not have agreed to perform with Barbara that day_ he says to himself, thinking to their historic first performance together. Now he wonders if he would ever find love like that again. "I guess I should start hitting town again." he mutters. From that moment, he begins to go to clubs more regularly and getting up to all sorts of crazy antics.

Naturally, the media caught wind of this and begins to milk the shit out of it, much to Bruce's displeasure. "We need to get him back." he says. "But he is too far gone." says Jason. "No we can still save him." says Damian. "He is not even that interested in the music anymore." says Tim. "We need to get him to be involved with the music again."

Meanwhile, Dick had cut all ties he has to the Wayne family and his former label and is now settling with another team. He appoints a man named Jack Napier as his new manager and even gets a wife by the name of Catalina Flores whom he married in secret at a Vegas wedding chapel. Almost immediately, the fans begin to disapprove of this, some of them already abandonning Dick as a result.

It was then announced that Dick would perform at the MTV VMA's as the opening act with many believing that this would be the moment that would redeem him. Boy were they in for a shock. Backstage on the night of the awards, Dick panics as soon as he hears about his family being there and even worse, his ex Barbara Gordon. _What are those bitches doing here?!_

"Time to go Dick!" a stage assistant calls. Dick nods and is led to the stage where the dancers were waiting for him. "Ladies and Gentlemen, give it up for Dick Grayson!" The crowd cheer, everyone watching in anticipation for this performance. The performance begins and eeveryone is left flabbergasted. Why? Because one, Dick is wearing an unflattering floral dress with baggy stripped pants and red shoes. Also his hair looked like it was not properly combed. Also during the performance, he is clearly lip synching and whilst that wouldn't be an issue since he and the Robins normally do that at times, this one was extremely painful to watch as Dick seemed not to know the lyrics of the song as his mouth was moving awkwardly and also he was moving very awkwardly, lacking the spark and energy he was had. It is hard to believe that this guy was once called the entertainer of his generation.

 _[Spoken]_  
 _It's Dickie Bitch_  
 _I see you,_  
 _And i just wanna dance with you_

 _Everytime they turn the lights down_  
 _Just wanna go that extra mile for you_  
 _You got my display of affection_  
 _Feels like no one else in the room (but you)_

 _[Bridge:]_  
 _We can get down like there's no one around_  
 _We keep on rocking, we keep on rockin'_  
 _Cameras are flashing while we're dirty dancing_  
 _They keep watching, keep watchin'_  
 _Feels like the the crowd was saying_

 _[Chorus:]_  
 _Gimme Gimme more_  
 _Gimme more_  
 _Gimme gimme more [x4]_

 _The center of attention, even when we're up against the wall_  
 _You got me in a crazy position (uh huh)_  
 _If you're on a mission (ooh)_  
 _You got my permission oh_

 _[Bridge]_

 _[Chorus (x4)]_

As expected, people, including Barbara and Roy Harper were laughing at him and making fun of him whilst his family and close friends look on in shock and horror.

 _[Spoken]_  
 _I just can't control myself, more_  
 _They want more?_  
 _Well I'll give them more (ow!)_

 _[Chorus (x4)]_

 _Gimme more gimme more_  
 _Gimme more gimme more babe_  
 _I just want more_

 _Gimme gimme gimme gimme gimme [x4]_

Once the performance was over, he runs off stage and heads out of the audiotorium. "Let us go find him!" says Bruce. The rest of the gang nods and goes off to find him. They search his apartment in Bludhaven and other places where he could be and do not find him.

The search continues day in day out for the next couple weeks and months. Yet no sign of him.

"Where could he gone?!" says Jason as he tears at his hair. Komi Anders his current girlfriend, rubs his back. Tim meanwhile is hard at work on his laptop trying to use his hacking knowledge to track down their brother. Damian is inconsolable as the poor kid breaks down in tears with their half brother Terry hugs him and cries too. Selina comforts both boys and sighs.

Bruce meanwhile is in his study staring out at the city nightsky. The worst that could happen to anyone is for them to lose their children. _No my mind must not go there. Dick is alive and well. He is probably just hiding because of the shame_.

Alfred walks into the room, a grim look in place. "Master Bruce-"

"Dick is not dead." Bruce then whips around, a determined look in place. "My son can never die." he says. Alfred simply nods. "I was just going to say that Master Dick might need some time to himself. You know, after all that drama. He just needs to reflect and slowly pick himself back up." he says.

Bruce sighs. "Thought so."

Alfred places a hand on his shoulder. "He will return when he is ready." Bruce nods and does not say anything. Alfred did have a point. This is more for Dick than anyone else because it is unlike the boy to get all emo over stuff. Nope Dick is an optimistic person and if he needs some personal space to re-discover himself than so be it.

Minutes later, Jason walks into Dick's old room, running a hand through his hair, completely confused. No one really knows what made Dick snap like but this goes way beyond the whole Barbara scandal. "Man Grayson." he mutters as he sinks into the former's bed, lost in thought. Tim walks in, comforting a still shaken Damian. "Any luck?" Jason asked. Tim shakes his head as he and Damian sit down beside him. Jason sighs and absent-mindedly hugs Damian. At that moment, a splash of red catches Tim's eye. Underneath Dick's pillow was a book.

"What's this?" he asked as he pulls the book out. He opens the first page and gasps. The other two crowd him. "This is Dick'' diary." he says. Jason raises an eyebrow. "Never knew he had one. Just know that he had a book where he often wrote songs and stuff." he says. "Don't you think we are invading his privacy by reading it?" Damian asked. Tim shakes his head. "If anything, this could answer a lot of questions about Dick and maybe give us an idea of what he could be up to right now."

Dick meanwhile hides out in a hotel somewhere. He managed to bribe the hotel staff and various people into hushing up about his whereabouts because last thing he needs to deal with are the paparazzi and also Jack and Tarantula. Ironically, a certain lover of his is in said hotel. He heads into the lift and heads straight to the penthouse suite of Malcolm Culkin better known as the rapper Midnighter. The hotel staff know him as he and Malcolm always have their rendezvouses and tend to plot together here. Yes Barbara was right about him, he did cheat on her but she herself was never faithful to him as she was always sleeping with Roy so what was he to do.

Once he walks into the room, a boy around his age with short jet black hair wearing black bathrobes walks in. "Seriously Grayson, what has gotten to you? Like how can you let that bitch and her boy toy get to you like that and make you sink that low?" he growls. Dick lets out a nervous laugh. "Oh that...well...she caught me off guard." he says. "But still Dickie, we have been playing this game with those two for years and now you want to let them win?!"

Dick sighs. "I...I dunno." Malcolm raises a hand through his hair. "Ok but still you screwed up. But no worries, we can always fix this shit." he says. Dick raises an eyebrow. "What's there to fix?" Malcolm rolled his eyes. "Have you forgotten who you are?! You are not just somebody! You are Dick motherfucking Grayson, the Heartbreak Kid, the boy with the ass that brings everyone to the yard! The Ultimate Opportunist ! Like have you forgotten the number of times Barbara keeps kicking you down and how you would always one up her and the other bitches to the point of having that bitch begging on her knees?! Why?! Because you are THE Bitch!"

Dick smiles. "Right you are. I did forget myself." Malcolm laughs. "See I know you like the back of my head." Dick nods."Which is why I need a pick me up to re-energize me. I do miss being my sexy old self."

At that moment, Malcolm's voice takes on a more sensual tone, "Really? How much do you miss it?" At that moment something within Dick changes as his eyes darken with lust. "Talk dirty to me M." Malcolm comes closer, wrapping a hand around Dick's waist. "Remember that day I sucked you off under the table at that restaurant when we were younger?" Dick bites out his lip and tries suppressing a moan. Oh he remembers that day alright and boy did it feel good. Most do not realize how screwed up he is or any of the Robins. Yes all four of them have their dirty little secrets. And then...there is Bruce and his sex life. If anything, Bruce corrupted Dick a lot more as he taught him that it was ok to screw others every once in a while.

Dick leans closer to Malcolm and whispers in his ear. "I remember that and the mind blowing sex we had afterwards in the car." He then pulls Malcolm into a kiss. Malcolm moans into the kiss. Minutes later, they part, Malcolm smirking. "Now that's the Dick I know." Dick then pulls away, sashaying his usual seductive yet commanding manner and then sits down on the bed. "Will have to pay the folks a visit. Meanwhile, you and I have a lot of plotting to do." he says. A ghost of an evil smirk appears on his face. "A little evil every once in awhile won't hurt so long as I get what I want." he says.

 **What devious plan does Dick have in store?**


	8. Burn the Witch

**Here come the bombshells. Warning: This isn't for the fainthearted.**

Tim flips through the diary and finds a random page. "This was aorund the time the Barbara scandal began." he says. "Read it." says Jason. Tim takes in a deep breath and begins to read out loud:

 _Forgive me Father for I have sinned. Tch! Since when do I ever feel guilty about the weight of my sins? I mean, all humans are sinners no matter how hard they try to deny it. I am the biggest filthiest sinner in this entire family that's for sure. Yet I have a certain image, a certain mask I must show the world every single day. Now that is no walk in the park I must assure you. I had to do all manner of shit to protect my image for years. I am sure that if my brothers ever find this diary and read through the contents, they would feel absolutely disgusted by what they read. That their supposedly holier than thou brother is nothing more than an asshole. Oh wait...they already know that I am kinda jerk. Afterall I always manipulate them, twist them to my own ends and needs and ignore theirs._

"Touche" says Jason. Damian snorts. Dick described himself way too well. Tim read on:

 _"Truth be told though, I have not always been like this. If anything,I was once the typical sickenly sweet cheerful boy back in the day, a stark contrast to the mask that I adopt in public..."_

"I knew it! I knew Grayson has been pretending to be a nice guy." says Damian.

 _"...as the real Dick Grayson is a fractured bitter soul, a boy so twisted, so selfish, so hollow that he would do anything to not just get to the top and have a taste of power but also, use whatever means possible to stay on top regardless of the means. I knows my brothers would chastise me for that but they themselves are not saints either. I mean Jason has slept with just as many people as I have..."_

Jason coughs at this. Trust Grayson to put that in that diary to make them feel worse than they already feel right now. But still he is right. None of them are saints.

 _"...or Tim and his lack of respect for privacy. Like this guy has enough ammo on people on his laptop as we speak not just for his family but for others as well. If that does not spell paranoid, I dunno what else does?"_ Tim smirks a bit. Spot on indeed.

 _"And then there is baby Damian who is quite an evil controlling shit. He kidnapped a couple of kids and tried forcing them to be his friends. That's not how friendships work Lil D!"_

"Tt!" was all Damian could say about that even though he did say the truth.

 _"Like that boy is a carbon copy of Bruce who is quite a manipulative bastard as well. I mean let's face it, all four of us have bits of Bruce of us which is not exactly a healthy thing."_ "He has a point ya know?" says Tim. The other two nod.

 _"As I was saying previously before digressing there, I am a fractured soul and that bitterness and lust for power dates back to my days in the circus. I often talk about the circus being this wonderful happy place but guess what? It wasn't. Well, when I am performing in front of a crowd it is fun. But when the curtain closes, reality comes crashing down. My life came tumbling down after my dad passed away from cancer. I was only 5 years old then. The pain and devastation hit mother so hard that she later turned to drinking to try and pacify the sorrow in her heart."_

 _"Unfortunately that did not help matters as the woman would later take out her anger on me and beat the shit out of me every single fucking day."_

"Holy shit!" says Jason. Damian put a hand over his mouth and gasped whilst Tim's eyes widened in shock. They always knew that Dick hated talking about his real family and often told reporters that his parents abandoned him on the streets. How long had he been hiding the truth and does Bruce even know?

 _"Things got to the point that I would dread performing those crazy acrobatic stunts or doing anything in general. I would often go sleep with the animals and not return to the house or would wait till mum is out before I go sleep. The rest of the circus folks were pretty hostile too . I mean, all the circus kids would often bully and throw rocks at me and call me all sorts of names. The real kicker came one summer evening. One of the assistants snuck into the room whilst I was sleeping and fucking defiled me right then and there.."_

"Oh my...no wonder he is like this! Poor Dick!" says Jason. Damian and Tim both cry as they hear this.

 _"I remember the horror, the pain, the tears I wept as I lost every single inch of my innocence. I made a vow that day that never again will I ever have to suffer like that ever again. I vowed that I would make all those who ever hurt me in any shape or form to pay for what they had done to me. And then disaster struck. I was lucky to have escaped the circus as I ran away into the woods and was crying there. I heard a lot of screams and shouts and ran back to see the commotion and lo and behold, the entire circus catches fire with every single living soul in there burning to ashes including my mother."_

"Whoa! Plot twist!" says Tim. _"Anyhow, I had no place to go so I turned into a street beggar and would go from place to place begging for food or money or something. As for how Bruce and I really met, it happened one day when I tried to steal some bread from a bakery and the owner of the shop caught me and beat the crap out of me and was about to kill me. Bruce happened to passing by and stopped the commotion and asked what had happened. He took pity on me and decided to adopt me on the spot. Why he took pity on a mere street rat like me is a great mystery."_

"We all ask ourselves that question everyday tbh." says Jason. "True." says Damian.

 _"Now you are getting a real big picture of just how messed up I truly am and why I treasure power so much and also my otherwise sexually precocious behaviour. Sex is a very valuable tool. Sometimes in order to get shit done in this town, you have to bend others to your rules, lure them in, make them dance to your tune and what better way than sex? That is why I often open my legs to others and let them fuck me and me fuck them back in return in order to win my battles. That and some good old fashioned blackmail. My plans almost always work. The only times they do not is whenever Barbara is involved. I guess you could say that I love that bitch. Maybe I did but truth be told, she is a very toxic individual. Always has been. Like we are talking about someone that only dated me for the fame. If I had known then I would have ditched her completely. Yet my delusional mind keeps clinging onto her. Jason always warned me about her but yet I refused to listen now look at the mess that I am in right now.."_

"Now I understand the whole Barbara thing. She is his first love." says Tim. "Yes but I noticed just how evil that girl is and tried to warn him." says Jason with a sigh. "Wonder what he is up to now." says Damian.

Dick and Malcolm are still at the hotel room and soon get to work. "I managed to hack into Barbara and Roy's phones and found these juicy shit. So if we anonymously leak these out, that will not only expose Gordon and her boy toy as frauds but it will also end their careers." says Malcolm. Dick smirks evilly. "Then by all means do it Mac. I want those two thots gone." he says. Malcolm soon gets everything ready and sends it to a friend of his that works at the Daily Mail. "Now watch the sparks fly." says Malcolm with a mischievous smirk.

Back at Wayne Manor, Helena Bertinelli rushes into Dick's room. "Guys you will not believe this!' The other Robins stare at her. "What do you mean?" says Tim. SHe comes closer and shows them her phone. They stare at it and gasp. Right there in front of them is a gossip blog's article that shows Barbara and Roy's private images and sex tape. "There is only one person I know of that will be dastardly enough to do this. Someone we all know too well." says Jason. They all exchange knowing smirks. Yes their psychotic evil big brother was back alright and 100 times more dastardly than ever.

Bruce sees the story about Barbara and smirks evilly. Oh this is very satisfying. Afterall, this is how he deals with his foes on a daily basis. "About time someone burnt the witch." At that moment, his phone rings. He checks the Caller Id and smirks and answers, "I see that you have regained your sanity huh Dick?"

The boy laughs from the other end of the phone. "Yes all thanks to saw the news right?" he asked. Bruce nods. "I sure did. I believe this is your evil handiwork hm?"

"Oh you know me too well. You know B, I intend to celebrate my little victory and make a sweet comeback Dad." says Dick. "Hm...if it is a huge party that you want then so be it. I shall arrange that. When do you intend to do it?"

"Tomorrow night."

"Fine then. I will tell your brothers and they will call everyone. I am sure that this will lure both Barbara and Roy out. So what we will do is to make it look like it is a random Wayne charity thing whereas it is your coming out party." says Bruce. "Love how we both think alike." his son replies. "You are my son what do people expect?"

Meanwhile at Burnside, Barbara is screaming and tearing her hair off. Not too long ago, private photos of herself and Roy dating back to when she and Dick were still dating got leaked out to the press by an unknown source. As if that wasn't damaging enough, a sex tape was also leaked out and showed her and Roy actually doing the do. "WHO DID THIS?! WHO DID THIS?!" she screams.

"Babs calm down." says Jim Gordon. "CALM DOWN?! WHAT DO YOU MEAN CALM DOWN FATHER?! THIS WAS SUPPOSED TO BE MY ULTIMATE MAGNUM OPUS AND NOW IT HAS BEEN TAKEN AWAY FROM ME!" she shouts. Jim sighed. He had warned Barbara about her scheming ways but the girl never listens. She sabotaged her sisters' careers so that she would be the sole superstar not just from the Barbies but also in the entire world forgetting that there is one other star that shines just as bright, if not brighter than she does and now it seems that that star has reclaimed his throne once again.

Dick meanwhile cackles evilly at the hotel as he watches the chaos unfold via the Internet. "God it feels so good to be back! Now an appropriate makeover is in order. I bet these bitches would never see this coming." he says as he kisses Malcolm. "We are so gonna paint this damn town red tomorrow." Dick smirks."I will not give up my throne without a fight. I will so fucking play dirty because power never felt so good."

 **I am thinking of doing different story arcs that focuses on each of the boys and may do a seperate story about Barbara and the Barbies. Damn Dick is an evil bastard xD. This is not over yet Babs and Roy will cause even more drama later. Plus more people are coming to challenge the Robins.**


	9. Announcement

**I have uploaded a new version of this fic here: /works/17429345**

 **You can also view it here: .com**


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